The Dallas Stars will kick off the Western Conference Finals of the Stanley Cup Playoffs against the Detroit Redwings tonight.  In celebration of their achievement, I would like to share a brief collection of phrases that could be heard during the broadcast of game 6 against the San Jose Sharks on Sunday:

 

“Vlasic gets it up…”

 

“He’s got to ram it home!”

 

“He pulls it out and loses it…”

 

“Prison rules!”

 

“Fistric two hands it…”

 

“He saved it with the top of his crack!” (This was not innuendo. He literally meant that Marty Turco saved a shot with the top of his butt crack.)

 

“They are like shriveled sausages rolling around in their own grease…”

 

And that is what playoff hockey is all about!

 

Vaya con Dios, amigos.

The Judge